Tuesday, September 6, 2011

I will not cry...I will NOT cry.

I know I just wrote in my last post that I wasn't big on doing the "Mom Blog" thing. (Nothing wrong with those blogs...I follow a few of them myself, and they're written by incredibly talented women.) Well guess who's about to have a Mom moment. Consider that your warning.

Today was the day I had been waiting for...for years! Last year was a teaser. Sending my youngest off to preschool was an amazing moment for me and my sanity, but it was only a short 2 1/2 hours later when his bus would return him home. I loved seeing him come home of course, but the whole year was just a tease as to what would be...what WOULD be - THIS YEAR!

Happy First Day of School!

My day began an hour earlier than last year. My oldest is now in a different school, has to catch a bus, and therefore needs to be ready to go an hour earlier. I'm considering my options of letting him make his own lunch and I'll sleep in for that hour.

I didn't really think that I would walk him down to the bus-stop...that would be too embarrassing for him, right? But still...this was my guy. My first-born. The one who wears every single one of his emotions on his sleeve for the big, bad, cruel world to just pluck off and possibly leave him hurt.

(Let him go...he'll be fine.) But he's only 11!

(He'll be fine!) Did he take his medication? Will he be able to focus all day? What happens if he can't find the right bus to come home on?

He'll Be Fine. (but what happens if somebody picks on my baby?)

I took a deep breath...a few first-day-of-school pictures...and I only walked him part of the way to the bus stop.

No tears were shed.

Child #2...my princess. My over-achieving, know-it-all, gifted with a love of all things school related little girl. I didn't even have to wake her up. She literally BOUNCED out of bed this morning at the appointed time her inner-alarm clock woke her up at precisely the correct time. Definately her father's daughter as I was still stumbling around the house dreading my decision to have never started a coffee habit.

Thank you God for at least one child that I don't have to constantly worry over.

Child #3...lil' D. This was where the excitement really kicked in. For me...not so much for him. It's not that he didn't WANT to go to school, he just doesn't care if he goes to school or not. All I knew is that lil' D going off to Kindergarten meant 6 hours of...ME time!! Oh yes, he was definately heading off to school!

At 8:00 am, I snapped those few additional obligatory pictures of #2 and #3, and I took off on what would be the first of a year full of walks back and forth to elementary school. The princess took her place amidst her other little princess friends where they immediately began chattering, catching up, and giggling over who knows what. (I was never like that...was I?)

Lil' D and I made our way together to the cafeteria - the designated waiting area for the youngest of the elementary tribe. I found myself talking to some other parents when I looked over and found him unpacking his lunch. Woah! Little dude, I know I told you that yes, you now get to eat lunch in the cafeteria, but just because you're IN the cafeteria right now, doesn't mean that it's actually lunchtime...right now. We laughed over that moment together, and soon they called his classmates to gather in line to make that long walk to his first day of class.

That's when it hit.

It was brief (they always are), but I felt the "mommy" emotions start to kick in. I saw the top of his little head in front of me, and then I looked over and caught the smile of my girlfriend's daughter, who was born a few months after lil' D was.

I suddenly remembered that 1st day of school 5 years ago when I took my other son to his first day of Kindergarten and left him in the cafeteria. As I walked out that day I had run into my girlfriend and pulled her to the side to whisper the news to her that we had just found out we were having another baby. To my surprise, she grabbed me right back and whispered in my ear "So are we!"

We screamed like a couple of silly women that day in the hallway...on that 1st day of school.

Now here we were sending those same two babies off to Kindergarten.

Yep...it was a "mom" moment. And the more I dwell on it, the closer I get to shedding some "mom tears" on this first day of school.

Happy 1st Day of School.

1 comment:

Allyson Ford said...

Love it Candy! It is bittersweet! It seems like they just started pre-school-so hard to believe they're now big kindergarteners!