Bittersweet Change...

Change is good - that's what I've been told, and for the most part, I think I really believe that. (I said, for the most part.)

Almost 10 years ago, I was pregnant with our first child. And in preparation for his impending arrival, we worked hard getting that little nursery "just right", including setting up the crib. Big D slept in that crib for his first 3 years before moving into his big-boy bed, and we took apart and stored away the baby crib.

A new house, and a year later the crib was once again set a new room, awaiting the arrival of the princess. I remember standing in the doorway of this nursery with my hand on my belly feeling very blessed that I would soon be the mommy of a little girl, and this would be a room for a princess!

The princess room was put on hold, because quicker than we knew what had hit, the princess was soon to be sharing her castle with baby #3!! Wanting to keep "the babies" on the 1st floor for the middle of the night moments that always happen...we found another crib - one that eventually converted into a toddler bed - set the princess up in that, and Lil' D slept peacefully in our original crib.

That was 4 years ago, and since then they have all grown up just a little and now it's time for change. The princess is getting that princess room after all, and the boys are becoming room-mates.

So today I set out to take down a baby crib for the very last time. I started in on the task very excited to be putting away yet one more baby thing. But by the time I was done, I sat there on the floor surrounded by crib parts, and remembered sitting in the middle of a different room when I was very pregnant and putting these pieces together. I remembered the 1st time that I put each of my children in that crib to sleep as newborn babies, and I remembered the 1st time I got up in the middle of the night to nurse my babies and rock them back to sleep. That crib has seen the effects of teething and the flu, and it has had it's share of diaper leaks. The springs on the side rails have always had a loud squeak giving away everytime my children wanted to try and jump in their beds without me knowing.

The crib has been put away, and I've spent the day cleaning out a room that once had 2 babies sleeping in there. I've cleaned out the closet of all diapers and baby wipes boxes, diaper bags, and various odds and ends that will no longer be needed. At one point I reached up onto the top shelf, and found a tiny little gray and white striped cap that Lil' D wore when he was just a few weeks old. One final reminder during this time of change of my babies who are growing much too quickly before my eyes.

Change can be good...but it can also be bittersweet.